Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
