I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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