ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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