Plan B is the new Plan A
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
