found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
