He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
There are leaves in my underwear?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
