It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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