first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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