You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
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