She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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