When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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