You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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