foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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