So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I believe in your delicious
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
