Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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