The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
