Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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