And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
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