She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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