I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Randomize
