im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize