remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
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