YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize