Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
