can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
