Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
