just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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