But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
