I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
