So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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