whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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