i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
