When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
