apparently the secret to your success is patron
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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