you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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