We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
