turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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