you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD