She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
She's like a pop up book from hell.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
