I'm gonna have a badass scar
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
