it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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