She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
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