What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
