that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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