Walk of Shame. In a state park.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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