Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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