Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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