dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize