if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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