The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
